Squirrels Push Andisheh Over the Edge
Decatur Metro | July 14, 2009
Uh...dude, that's a rabbit...
With the recent resurgence of vegetable gardens across the nation, I bet there are a lot more people hating our wild, furry friends than ever before.
Andisheh is just the latest victim of squirrel-on-man crime in the Atlanta area. And his hated-filled rant against tomato-loving grey squirrels over on Fresh Loaf reminds me of a great NY Times piece from last summer entitled “Peter Rabbit Must Die.” In summary, if you think squirrels are bad, rabbits are pure evil when it comes to backyard produce.
Maybe the good folks over at the Oakhurst Community Garden could set up a support group/class for victims of fuzzy animal infractions, like Andisheh.
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They haven’t made their way to my blessed tomato plants. Yet.
High five on the Photoshop, mate!
I wish I didn’t have to leave you hanging bud, but the pic is ripped straight from the Times article.
It was the bloody d@mned chipmunks in our yard– little tossers not only gnawed the tomatoes, but routinely dug under the plants. I thought they were cute for about 3 minutes before I started getting sick of them. If our cats were outdoors-acclimated, I’d let them at ‘em! *sigh* Needless to say, we gave up on the patio garden this year…
Cubra, so, you picked up the lingo while in the UK then!
Just the swear words! (If you’re gonna swear, might as well sound civilized while you’re doing it…)
Sounds like you could use a barn cat. I just happen to have a lovely one that needs a home with rodent issues. Just say the word and he is yours.
Aw, Nitzi, I wish I could take your kitty! But honestly, if I took him, he’d become an indoor cat before too long anyway, so I’d be right back where I started: chipmunk-rich and predator-poor.
Cubra, I didn’t know you were a rodentist! I love chipmunks and squirrels.
LOL@ “rodentist”– makes me sound like I work on rodents’ teeth! Alas, even my general love of fauna, domesticated and wild, isn’t enough to curb the dislike I’ve developed for chipmunks. I’ve simply lost too many vegetable plants & flower bulbs to them; plus, they’ve dug so many tunnels underneath our yeard that it’s caused part of our patio to sink & crack. I wish there was an alternative, but these ‘munks have sealed their death warrants. That is, as soon as I can muster up the will to call the exterminator. Maybe I should actually take Nitzi up on the offer of the barn kitty…
My cats are a blessing when it comes to keeping my tomatoes safe. Unfotunately they go after the birds as well. Guess that’s all part of nature.
We had a cat that was so lazy and useless, the squirrels would practically tap dance on his head. Blue jays used to eat out of his dish and he’d just doze and watch them. Needless to say, the birds and squirrels treated our garden as a buffet!
Couldn’t help but think of Andisheh when I saw this:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/14/squirrel-gets-head-stuck_n_231675.html
I would just shoot them.
Seriously.
Lovely and heartfelt.
Though I hate tree rats (aka squirrels) with a burning passion, they don’t seem to bother the veggies in the backyard. I think the well-stocked rat feeders (that my wife insists are bird feeders) we keep in the front yard keep them too full to see what’s around back. The birds, however, love to peck holes in the tomatoes.
Yesterday, the little rodents dismantled one of our most expensive “squirrel proof” feeders and one was actually inside it shoveling the contents out for his buddies. They do entertain the dog though.
My mother sometimes asks me to bring bags of used cat litter for her to scatter throughout her garden. She tells me it keeps all the tree rats away. I feel guilty for the deal–she feeds us, and I bring her a bag of cat sh*t. Seems like a dirty trick.
I have not convinced Eva that this is an acceptable form of organic gardening however, and now we have two large tomatoeless tomato plants in our back yard.
Well the tree-rats certainly got all of OUR tomatoes (3rd year in a row!) as well as our neighbors’. Too bad the grey squirrels are so prolific lately. They are not even native to GA… we consider them pests!
I didn’t know cat litter would discourage squirrels. Does it really work? And if so, I wonder why…… (I am assuming it is “unused” cat litter!)
Nope. It’s used.
That’s why Eva won’t let me try it.
Squirrels are pests! Agggggh, I don’t know how I ever thought they were cute. They’ve done some damage to my attic, nesting in there and chewing their way through the fascia boards. Haven’t gotten to my cherry tomatoes..yet.
Did you know time! The grey squirrel was first introduced from the US to the UK in Victorian times as a curiosity, but it’s now a major pest over there, and has largely wiped out the native British red squirrel:
http://conservation-issues.co.uk/Articles%20Pages/Grey_Squirrel_Article_07-07.htm
Some restaurants actually offer squirrel on the menu in the UK. Britain isn’t famed for its cuisine, but that sounds especially gross. I saw a Gordon Ramsey show on BBC America where they were cooking one up – it looked stringy as heck, and according to the taster had a real nutty flavor (seriously).
How is that different from eating rat? I mean, I understand it during the Depression or if you are desperate for food, but as a DELICACY?
True enough! Then again, I’ve not rushed into any into any restaurants to order up rat on toast for my breakfast…. I’ve had ratatouille a few times, but don’t think that’s real rat (no kids, only joking, not the Disney character).
I tried cat litter. I tried human hair clippings. I tried putting my cats outside. I even mail-ordered granulated fox urine over the internet (nothing surprises me any more).
The squirrels just laughed and laughed, and then they went back to munching my tomatoes, my Swiss chard, my squash, even the peppers. Pretty much everything.
Finally, this spring, I erected what I am boldly calling the “Squirrel Proof Net Tent” over my entire garden. It looks kind of like a circus tent, only the tent part is made out of nylon garden netting. Lo and behold! I have enjoyed a bumper crop of tomatoes for the first time in five years. And I’m growing corn. If the corn crop survives (should know in a week or two), then I’m patenting the thing and taking orders.
The squirrels had their revenge, though. They chewed through the insulation on some electrical wiring outside my house. And then they laughed and laughed.
Recipe for BBQ squirrel (SERIOUSLY?!?!?), courtesy of http://www.backwoodsbound.com/zsquir14.html:
~ 4 squirrels, quartered
~ 3 tbsp salt
~ 2 tsp pepper
~ 1 tsp garlic powder
~ 1 tsp onion powder
~ your favorite dry rub
~ 15 charcoal briquets
~ 3 handfuls hickory chips
~ your favorite bbq sauce
In a large pot, boil the squirrel in water seasoned with the salt, pepper, garlic powder and onion powder for 1 hour or until tender.
In the meantime, soak the hickory chips in water. Light the charcoal and let them get white hot. Place them to one side of your grill.
Remove the squirrel from the water and pat dry. Coat with your favorite dry rub.
Add one handful of wood chips to the hot coals.
Place squirrel on grill across from the hot coals. Cover and smoke for 1 hour. Add a handful of wood chips every half hour.
Add last of the wood chips and baste squirrel with bbq sauce. Smoke for another half hour basting another 3 – 4 times.
Serve with mashed potatoes, sweet corn and buttermilk bisquits.
Oklahoma squirrel recipe. Skin, clean, and quarter. Boil furiously for 2 hours in plenty of water, with salt, pepper, and added oil of some kind. Take out meat quarters and drop in Bisquick biscuit dough chunks (don’t pay any attention to Bisquick’s “dumpling” recipe on the box — just mix the dough as if you were making biscuits). When the dumplings have boiled and bobbed and floated around in the furiously boiling squirrel broth for about 10 minutes, with a gentle stirring now and then, take them out of the broth and surround the squirrel meat on a platter. Voila! Delicious!
Someone told me to try Irish Spring soap, just put it in your garden. Haven’t bought any yet, but I’m going to try it. Also, my father-in-law told me to pull the tomatoes before they are totally ripe on the vine and let them finish inside. I tried this and they are still hands down, better then store bought.
Netting and a motion-activated sprinkler seems to have kept them off our garden tomatoes . . . for now.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdYc86AA8M0)
One could strap the sprinkler to the rail of the deck. The thing even scares me when I forget it’s there. Bought ours at In-Town Ace Hardware on Scott Blvd.
Or you could do like they do in Memphis and use strawberry containers to protect the maters.
http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2009/jul/10/produce-protection/