A Decatur resident nearly fainted this morning after reading portions of a Fresh Loaf post about neighborhood opposition to a Beltline plan that would add a crapload of density at the edge of Piedmont Park at the intersection of 10th and Monroe.

The individual, described as a 30 year-old male with a passing interest in planning & zoning, told website authorities that after having read two paragraphs in a “gripping post” by Creative Loafing reporter Thomas Wheatley, he started having violent, uncontrolled flashbacks.

The following is a sample of the article, and should only be read by those with no history of zoning-coma disorder.

“Allowing any development at 10th and Monroe, let alone an eight story building and four story buildings on land that is currently designated as single family residential, will constitute the worst form of bait and switch,” Jenifer Keenan, a Virginia-Highland resident, recently wrote in a letter to Beltline officials (and here in Fresh Loaf comments.) More than 120 homeowners have already signed a petition opposing the Beltline proposal.

Keenan, who was part of the grassroots effort to block Mason’s plan for two 38-story towers at the same corner, says the resident opposition isn’t about NIMBYism, but protecting Piedmont Park and the neighborhood from inappropriate development. She worries that dense development would mar the charm of the city’s most iconic greenspace. She also says that the city risks establishing a dangerous precedent if it decides to rezone property it owns. (Last year, the city purchased the unused railroad tracks and nearly 66 acres in the corridor from Mason.)

Asked to recount what he saw during these flashbacks, the man replied through tears, “All I can remember is first seeing a giant 60s style skyscraper and a large empty parking lot. Then I saw a large group of people yelling at each other about building heights,  parking variances, NIMBYism and something called “Livable Growth”.  Then everything changed and I was outside of a university, standing in the middle of a giant 5-way intersection.  The people here were very nicely dressed, but were obviously very angry about something and kept screaming about character and density.”

And while this one individual claims to have regained his composure for the time-being, it is unknown how many near-faintings caused by density-fighting flashbacks go unreported every single day.